Where is your website going?

(A few thoughts from a different source.)

All about web, multimedia and graphic design.

 

Site and Contents (unless otherwise specified) © Englesos on the Web 2012

It seems to be in the nature of things that a certain type of client will use an alleged ignorance of the internet and matters related to try to "mission-creep" their promised monthly updates into a full redesign or else to upgrade webmaster into web-and-IT-specialist-antivirus-master when their son who "knows about computers"* nukes their office network into oblivion by downloading and installing a dodgy version of Warcraft on the office server.

I include a few highlights of demands made by such individuals just to balance out an earlier article elsewhere in this site written from the other side of the fence.  :-)

 

Please include this on the site - it will not take long. (These words spoken whilst waving a 50 page brochure or an equal number of pages of hand written text or poor quality photocopies)

How right you are!  Because I 'aint doing it!  The impression that there is a slot on the back of my monitor into which I drop treeware (alias paper documents) and the computer spits it all out as properly formatted web pages is a fantasy I would like to dispel.  Get your secretary to type it out and we can talk. 

 

Just grab a few images from Google....

Why?  Did you forget their web address?  Go steal your own stuff!

 

Can you make the site greet each viewer by name in a tone of voice that varies according to their biorhythm status?  And based on age it calls them by their first name or surname?

When we first got together we discussed what a site could do.  Bizarre flights of fantasy we can probably organise though so just add another three zeros to your budget and I'll make some calls.

 

Can I have the site in green?  No, blue......I mean orange.....actually I'm not sure.......

Go away and come back when you are.  This stuff should happen before you and I ever meet or else when we are still looking at the basic design.  After the site has launched is too darn late.

 

Design five or six sites and I'll choose.

Cool - as long as you realise that this is a really expensive way of doing business.  And what will you do with the sites you didn't choose but did pay for?  Best we design just the one together.

 

I'm going to order three sites as long as you discount the first one.

But of COURSE you are, but I'll discount the third one.  Maybe the second.

 

But I thought my dynamic site would last forever.

Neither it nor I will last forever, things change and become obsolete.  After all, Windows 3.1 did not ship with an expiry date but is there anyone out there still using it?  Even my rock solid friend HTML varies from time to time.  No, nothing is forever.  One day its going to want changing.

 

Yes I know I said HTML - now how do I log in to make changes?

You don't.  What you do is to learn to pay attention then e-mail the changes to me.

 

So there it is and as time goes by it will grow.  The message is?  Agree on what you need BEFORE talking to anyone so that you now what you really want and your chosen guru can give you an informed answer.  And remember, don't expect to pay for the Mini and bargain it skilfully into a Porche.

 

It aint gonna happen.

And your soul is MINE webmaster

 

I wrote this post once before but PHPWS's article system decided I did not need it any more - the system rather than the article. Since setting down my virtual pen on the issue I found more and more instances cropping up in these cash strapped times.

 

So here we go again.....

*"knows about computers" - Can correctly identify a computer 7 out of 10 times and wreck its OS just by sitting at the keyboard with his/her moron friends.

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